Today I am talking about something that has affected me my entire life and affects so many people every day. Anxiety. It can be short-lived, due to life stresses or a part of someone’s everyday life but no matter how it is brought on, it can be hard to overcome. I am sharing my coping tools and what I have learned along my journey.
Anxiety shows its ugly face in many different ways. For me, it’s my evil twin holding me back whispering in my ear that I’m not good enough or how I can’t do it. It’s the worried thoughts that keep me up at night, jolting me out of a half-sleep gasping for air, the tightness in my chest and the heart palpitations that scare the sh*t out of me every time. It’s the panic attacks that make my arms to go numb and vision blurry, it’s the fight or flight feeling that makes me bolt (I have literally up and left social gatherings because of panic). The worst part of my anxiety is that I know it is ridiculous, irrational, something I shouldn’t be worried about, but not being able to pull myself out of it no matter how hard I try.
I am writing this post to talk about it because I feel that it is not talked about enough. Anxiety disorders are treatable, yet only about one-third of those suffering receive treatment; why? I can tell you for me, it has been the fear of judgment. After sharing I usually go on to worry about it for days; what if they think I’m crazy? maybe I shouldn’t have said that, so it seems easier to not share because if I do, I may lose nights of sleep caught in the worried tornado. Through experience, I am learning that keeping it all to myself only makes it worse.
Anxiety is the most common mental disorder worldwide, affecting about 1 in every 13 people. That is a lot of people and a big support group. Talking about it can connect you to people who have similar experiences and it’s great to find someone who can make you feel like you are not alone in this. Whether it was a friend, a family member or a professional, I think talking about it has helped me the most.
I have dealt with this my entire life. Along the way and I have picked up a few tricks and learned a lot! There are many options out there to help anxiety and a lot are just small changes or additions to everyday life. It takes time and practice, but these are the things that have helped calm my mind and body.
Hydration & Food
Staying hydrated is very important for me to stay calm. Dehydration can cause uncomfortable symptoms like headaches, fatigue, and sore muscles. Add these things to an anxious person and it’s a panic attack waiting to happen. So drink up! The amount of water intake varies depending on weight and activity level. My daily goal is to drink at least half my body weight in ounces of water. Check out this article on how much water to drink from Slender Kitchen.
Drinking water is so hard for me for some reason, I rarely meet my daily goal. I’ve had to try different ways to remember to drink water including, alerts on my phone, water bottle with a straw (easier to drink), lemon or fruit in my water or a big jug that I have to finish by the end of the day. Find what works for you.
We all know about being hangry, well I get anxious when I need to eat. Maybe we could call it anxgry. Whatever it is called, it’s just as real as being hangry. Some of my worst anxiety attacks were caused by going too long between meals. Eating every two hours can help prevent anxiousness and choosing quality foods. If you get anxgry here is a list of 10 foods to help ease anxiety and stress from Kati O’Brien.
Mindfulness
This world is busy and almost always connected to something which can cause us to go into autopilot and rarely be present. Mindfulness brings you into the current moment and counteracts the worrying; if you are present in the moment you can’t worry about yesterday or tomorrow. I try to practice this every day and it has helped calm me down from my worst panic attacks. Here are a few easy exercises.
- While doing something like brushing your teeth or washing the dishes, disconnect from devices and focus on what you are doing. Notice the sounds and sensations and when your mind wanders, no big deal just bring it back to what you are doing.
- Anchor or ground yourself by noticing the feeling of your feet hitting the ground while walking or the feeling of your feet on the ground while sitting. This creates the feeling of being secure and in control which calms you. In moments of increasing panic, a quick way to reduce it is to take your shoes off (if you are at a place you can) and stand in the grass. Focus on the feeling of your feet in the grass and the connection to the ground. This is the quickest way I have found to feel grounded and calm.
- This is my favorite mindfulness exercise, I use it for when I just can’t shake the anxious feeling. Go outside, take a seat and anchor yourself. Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Name 3-4 things (out loud or in your head, your choice) that you can hear, feel, smell, and lastly open your eyes and name what you can see. This is similar to the 5-4-3-2-1 game.
Mindfulness has taken practice and time to help my anxiety, so if you try don’t get discouraged if results don’t show right away.
Essential Oils
Essential oils can help with so many different things from cleaning, treating bruises to reducing stress. Lavender oil is with me everywhere I go because of its calming effects. It can really help in a moment of anxiety or stress. When I feel anxious I put a dab of oil under my nose and take a couple deep breaths. Chamomile and rose are other great oils for anxiety and depression. Essential oils can also be used by massaging into your neck, temples, chest or the bottom of your feet or with a diffuser in your home. I use now essential oils and doTerra; young living has great oils also.
Hobbies
Staying busy is key to keeping my worried thoughts at bay. Having hobbies and things that I am passionate about gives my brain a way to channel the energy. One of the reasons I started this blog. In addition to being what I am passionate about, Sage to Silver is an outlet to channel my thoughts. Having hobbies that include working with your hands can really help anxiety, such as pottery, gardening or painting.
The biggest lesson I have learned is to not be ashamed of my anxiety. Most people who struggle with this are sensitive and I mean that in a good way. We are caring, compassionate, understanding, helpful and aware. Anxiety may hold me back in areas, but there is always a silver lining and I would say that is a pretty awesome one.
Of course, if the anxiety/worry becomes overwhelming and you feel like you can’t cope on your own, please reach out for help. I have had to ask for help so many times and wouldn’t have made the same amount of progress if I hadn’t. I hope these tools help you and remember that you are strong, important and not alone in this. It can get better. Feel free to reach out to me with any questions here.
The Mom says
Well put together article. I hope it helps others.
Sometimes it’s just impossible to ignore the anxiety, even tho I’ve had decades of practice.