The Best Ways to Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt can cripple our progress and keep us stuck in places we wish we could move on from. Self doubt can be hard to overcome, but with creating new habits and changing our mindset we can silence these thoughts

Throughout the month of May, which is Mental Health Awareness Month I have shared some of my story about struggling with Mental Illness. It has been a great (and scary!) experience opening up about my struggles and hearing other’s stories. Since we are almost to the end of the month, I wanted to open up about one more thing I and so many others struggle with; self-doubt.

Self-doubt. It is not a fun feeling. Most people feel self-doubt throughout their life. It is that convincing voice that can hold you back and keep you from your true potential.

As someone who has struggled with mental illness my whole life, self-doubt goes hand in hand with most of them. It is hard to admit, but it has taken me years to start believing in myself. Self-doubt has grouped up with my OCD and obsessive worry and kept me moving at a snails pace for years.

Every action I take, self-doubt is there to make sure I consider the fact that I might not be able to do it, or that I am not the best person for the job, or that I might fall flat on my face.

Doubting thoughts plague my mind like:
What if no one likes it?
You obviously can’t do this!
You should just quit because you are never going to make it!

Ugh. Even writing those out makes me fill up with anxiety! Why are we so mean to ourselves!? These types of thoughts and feelings can get away from us if we do not actively rein them in and learn how to combat them. It is natural for a little self-doubt, but we cannot let it run our lives.

Although it is scary we can overcome self-doubt by pushing through and stepping outside of our comfort zone. Feeling doubt and doing it anyways!

I share some tips that I have learned over the years to say no to self-doubt and say yes to yourself and your capabilities. We can make progress together and find our true potential. We are in this together!

If you want more tips on self care; check out my post on 6 Uplifting Self Care Ideas That Will Change Your Life.

Challenge the “chatter”

Negative chatter is the basis of self-doubt. It is what your brain does when it is feeling insecure. The merry go-round of thoughts that you are not good enough or cannot succeed. Well, I am here to tell you most of the time, they are lies!

By challenging these thoughts we force our brain to work through these feelings. It is so easy to allow the brain to take off and spin on feelings, but by challenging these thoughts, over time the spinning can slow down.

For example, if your thought is
“I can’t do this work project, I am not smart enough”

You can challenge these thoughts by saying to yourself “How am I not smart enough?”, “why wouldn’t I be able to learn how to do it?”, “I learned how to do the last project, what makes this different?”. By doing this it makes you stop and think things through instead of getting stuck in the negative merry go round.

Talk to yourself as if you are talking to a friend with the same concerns. You wouldn’t allow your friend to feel dumb, you would tell them that they are capable and present examples of why they are capable.

Challenge that chatter!

Positive Affirmations

I have said it before and I will say it again. Positive affirmations are so great to turn those negative thoughts and around and re-wire your brain to think differently.

When a negative, self doubting thought comes into your head, combat it with a positive one. It can take time, but if you practice positive affirmations everyday, over time you will change your mindset to be more positive.

If you can, say them out loud! When a thought, like “I am so weird and awkward” comes into your head, immediately challenge it with “I am a fun and caring person”. You may feel like you are saying these things over and over again, but that is what will re-wire your brain to believe it!

Stop the Comparisons

Ugh. This is a tough one, isn’t it!? We are in a social media world where you can literally look into someone’s life just by opening an app on your phone. It is really hard to not compare your life to someone else’s, when it is right there at your fingertips.

Comparisons can be really dangerous. They can cause you to feel inadequate sole based on what someone else’s life looks like. But let’s remember that social media is not real life! Every one puts their best self on these platforms and most of the time realty does not look like that.

So when you feel yourself comparing, move along. Do not sit in that feeling and allow it to overtake you. This would also be a great time for a positive affirmation.

Sharpen Your Skills

If you are feeling self-doubt in a specific area of you life, sometimes it can help to learn more about it. This can help you feel more confident in that area because you have the knowledge to back it.

I don’t know about you, but I always feel good about myself after I have learned something new. Especially when it is an area that I have wanted to grow in. This will not only give you the knowledge to feel more confident, it will also prove to that negative chatter that you in fact can do it!

If you are feeling insecure about public speaking, take a class. Too afraid to take a class, start with an online course. Taking steps towards becoming more confident do not have to be huge steps. Baby steps are just as good, as long as you keep stepping forward.

Get out of the Comfort Zone

Okay, so I kept the best for last. Comfort zones will kill us, slowly. They are what keeps up stuck in places we do not want to be.

I know that getting out of your comfort zone can be one of the scariest things you can do. We avoid this because the feelings it gives us are not fun. But once you are on the other side of that comfort zone, everything seems so much clearer.

When I was invited on to Afternoon Live, a local Portland lifestyle show I was TERRIFIED! I had all the mixed feelings of wanting to do it, but not wanting to do it. Oh yea, did I mention the show was live! I was so scared, but while I was feeling those feelings I realized that I had to do it. That fear was what convinced me that I had to do it. It showed me putting myself out there was something that I needed to experience.

Now I have been a monthly guest on the show for a year! That fear that I felt a year ago on my first show has diminished and I am now more confident to talk in front of people.

“Feel the fear and do it anyways”

Do you struggle with self-doubt? Tell me about it in the comments!